The past week has been a lot easier going to work. I can't remember the last time it was this easy going to work. When I was with Mike, he always tried to convince me to take time off. I didn't like to take time off, but I also wanted to spend time with him. It made me feel like our roles were turned and I should be more of the one staying at home and he needed to be the one off working. But I knew that was never going to change. I LOVE my job, I'm glad I have stuck with it and it is the one thing that keeps my mind busy right now.
I have learned a lot the past few weeks while staying at Nancy's. Tyler really cheers me up. How can he not when you wake up to a sweet, innocent little boy saying to you "Oh, hello Nicky Poo Poo. I'm so glad to see you" Whether he is really glad to see you or not, nobody will ever know. He walks me to the door every morning and he will push me out the door and say "i'll see you after work and after my school. I love you!"
Last night in his bed time prayers, he said to "please bless nicky poo, mom-e, dad-e, tyler the professor, and baby grayson that we can talk to dr walker about going to the beach with mickey mouse" He wants me to go on his make-a-wish trip with him. That makes me feel so loved by him. Also by Nancy and Dallas that they are going to do what they can to make that happen.
I cannot even tell my family thank you enough for everything you do for me. A special thank you to my parents. Mom and Dad,you are the best parents ever! You are so supportive ad understanding. I'm trying to understand and get back on the path, it takes time and effort and prayer.. I'm trying. I'm reading a lot, praying a lot..
Nancy and Dallas--I can say thank you til I'm blue in my face. You guys have given me a home when I didn't have one. You are helping me mentally, physically and spiritually. thank you, thank you, thank you! I love you guys so much
Tammy and Josh--Thanks for being there, even just to listen. Sometimes that's all I need. I really appreciate and I know I haven't told you guys enough. I love you
Barrett and Chantel--Thanks for helping me store some of my belongings up there. it lifted a lot of stress off of me and helped me know that I will still be able to have stuff after these next few months. Having you guys back is really good!
I know that My family is probably thinking... another depression with Nicky.. I'm so sorry. I'm trying to pull out of it. I love you guys so much for helping me with this.
I also want to thank my friends. They know who they are (even though I know they don't read this blog) but i have told them all specifically thank you for everything that they do. They are so amazing in my eyes..
Thank you, thank you, thank you.
Thursday, September 15, 2011
Sunday, September 11, 2011
Is it really 10 years!?!
When I think back to 9/11, I can remember the day so vividly. I can remember the smell, the feel of the air... I was in my first year at Snow College I was living with one of my best friends, Alissa Jacobson. That Tuesday morning, I got up and was going to my Microbiology lab. I want to say it was the first one of the school semester. The class started at 7, so nothing happened before class. When the class got out at 9, I got to my car and turned on the local college radio station and that's when I heard the news... The World Trade Center was just attacked and an airplane ran into it. I didn't believe it. I didn't live that far from the campus but our apartment didn't have cable yet, so I slowly drove myself home and sat in the parking lot of my house so I could hear more. I got home and I immediately called my mom. I knew she would know what was going on. She was at work but she got on and she confirmed that it was real, a plane had hit the building. She told me I NEED to find a TV! I knew then that this day was going to be something I was going to remember for the rest of my life. This was something different, something tragic. Our neighbors had cable, so we had all crammed into their house. When I say we, I'm saying that literally. I lived with girls from the Snow College basketball team, and ALL of the team (and their roommates) crammed into that the apartment. (We were all really tight that year)
We all missed class that day. I did go to my afternoon class, but we didn't do anything. All of the classes had the News on, the teachers didn't want to miss anything.
That night, the bishop of my college ward called a special prayer. We met at the church and I don' remember much about the prayer but I remember him telling all of us to be prepared for a lot of change. Things are never going to be the same. But the Sunday before the attack, there was a fireside and he said to remember what was said in the fireside (I don't remember what was said). I do remember Bishop saying if we need to, top our cars off with gas, because the gas prices are going to raise and we will see them over $4/gal (we were all in shock!) He made sure to tell us that we were all going to be ok but things were never going to be the same after the events that happened that day. Boy, was he right. You should have seen the line of cars at Maverick that night, everyone wanted to put gas in their cars and make sure we were all full :)
10 years later, I look back and see everything that has gone on. Gas prices have gone up $4/gal. I was thinking the other day that Lexi (my niece) was alive but she was only 1. She has no recollection of what went on. That all the little kids will have to learn about this in history class and I lived through it. I got to see it! That is just amazing to me. This past week in the Emery County Progress they had an article that the kids were going to learn about 9/11 and I thought to myself, why do they need to "learn" about it.. Then it hit me, they were so little! That just really shocks me. It doesn't seem that it was that long ago, but it was 10 years ago! (am I getting that old)
While looking through pictures and videos of all the 9/11 memories, the emotions from that day come back. The days after 9/11, I remember we got the newspaper at our house, I would save the newspaper. I have them tucked away in my cedar chest. I knew that someday someone might want to see things in those paper. I guess I learned that from my grandpa Rue. I have the front page of the paper the day after with a picture of the Twin Towers getting hit.
So, where were you when the world stop turning, that September day? Heaven got a lot of angels that day.
We all missed class that day. I did go to my afternoon class, but we didn't do anything. All of the classes had the News on, the teachers didn't want to miss anything.
That night, the bishop of my college ward called a special prayer. We met at the church and I don' remember much about the prayer but I remember him telling all of us to be prepared for a lot of change. Things are never going to be the same. But the Sunday before the attack, there was a fireside and he said to remember what was said in the fireside (I don't remember what was said). I do remember Bishop saying if we need to, top our cars off with gas, because the gas prices are going to raise and we will see them over $4/gal (we were all in shock!) He made sure to tell us that we were all going to be ok but things were never going to be the same after the events that happened that day. Boy, was he right. You should have seen the line of cars at Maverick that night, everyone wanted to put gas in their cars and make sure we were all full :)
10 years later, I look back and see everything that has gone on. Gas prices have gone up $4/gal. I was thinking the other day that Lexi (my niece) was alive but she was only 1. She has no recollection of what went on. That all the little kids will have to learn about this in history class and I lived through it. I got to see it! That is just amazing to me. This past week in the Emery County Progress they had an article that the kids were going to learn about 9/11 and I thought to myself, why do they need to "learn" about it.. Then it hit me, they were so little! That just really shocks me. It doesn't seem that it was that long ago, but it was 10 years ago! (am I getting that old)
While looking through pictures and videos of all the 9/11 memories, the emotions from that day come back. The days after 9/11, I remember we got the newspaper at our house, I would save the newspaper. I have them tucked away in my cedar chest. I knew that someday someone might want to see things in those paper. I guess I learned that from my grandpa Rue. I have the front page of the paper the day after with a picture of the Twin Towers getting hit.
So, where were you when the world stop turning, that September day? Heaven got a lot of angels that day.
Thursday, September 8, 2011
Does this Roller Coaster have seat belts?
A lot has happened the past week for me in my life. I never thought I would have had to go through this all over again, but I do. I was so happy with Mike (or so I thought) and we were fine (or so I thought). Last Tuesday while I was at work, I got the most random email from him. I just got done talking to him and he was fine. He then emailed me and said that he was going back to his wife and kids and then said thanks for everything. My world felt like it had shattered. I sat there just looking at this email. It felt so surreal. I went into my boss' office and they (my boss and coworker) and my boss told me to sit in her office, I just cried. She told me I needed to go home and see what all he took from the house. I didn't want to face the fact that he was gone. At least not alone. So I called my sister Nancy, I was crying on the phone and I asked her if she could meet me at my house because Mike left. I got to the house the same time she did. I walked in and there were things thrown all over the house. I didn't know where to even start. I am so grateful I had her there to help me compose myself and to help me figure out what I needed to do. We got the locks changed so he couldn't get in, since he didn't leave the house key. I talked to the manager and told her that no matter what he is NOT allowed in the house. There were a lot of choices me and Mike made that probably weren't the best choices and now I have to live with them. He left me with $4 in my account. I cannot even start to tell my family how grateful I am that they are there for me. That night, I stayed at Nancy's. I was able to get really good sleep that night (thanks to sleeping meds). I didn't make it into work that next day, but my boss completely understood!
Wednesday, Tammy came down with Koy (she had a dentist appointment) and her and Nancy took me out to lunch. Nancy also made me an appointment with a therapist. It was good to have them here and just knowing that my sisters were there to cry to. It was really good to talk to a therapist who didn't have any connections with the situation and could just listen and didn't really have to give any input but she did tell me that I did nothing wrong. She did encourage me to cry a lot and if needed, take a lot of walks. Knowing that I have had this similiar thing happen in the past (twice) I keep thinking, what is wrong with me.
Thursday and Friday I did go to work and start in on my normal routine. It was hard, I cried a lot and I would cry out of the blue. But I pulled through. I have a lot of coworkers and a boss who really cares.
Saturday morning, we went to the Hydrocephalus walk at Sugarhouse Park. That was fun to enjoy that with Tyler. That was just the beginning of the family filled weekend. My parents came up that day because Grayson was getting blessed in church. After much thinking and talking with my family, we decided that the best thing for me to do is move out of my apartment that I was living in and move into Nancy and Dallas' house in the spare room for a few months. So Saturday, that's what we started doing. We got A LOT packed! My dad is just amazing. He had a torn meniscus and he was helping me pack. Mom did what she does best, held the baby while we packed (she's a grandma!) By the time we were done that night, we were so done!
Sunday we got up and went to Grayson's blessing. It was good to go back to church. It has been a long time. While I was sitting there between my brother and sister, I had so many thoughts going through my mind. This is what I want; I want someone who can sit with me and my family at church, someone who will come and be with my family. My family has played such an important role the past week, I want whoever is in my life to know that my family is always going to be in my life, NO MATTER WHAT. Later that night, we went and moved the bigger items from the apartment. My brother was so helpful and he bought my couches from me. (He really needed the loveseat for his office but oh well, he still helped out) and he stored my bed for me.
Monday we took all the stuff up to Cache Valley cuz we were heading up to the land of the cows for the Labrum Family Reunion! It was so good to be around all my family. I had my cousins and aunt and uncles come up and just ask if I was ok. They are such a strength.
So, now here I am. I am living at Nancy's. It's hard to know that a week ago all this happened. But I am so proud that I have been able to pull through this. I know that if it wasn't for my family, I don't know how I could've done it. I know I will definately have my ups and downs. Since this is the 3rd time this has happened, I just have to keep telling myself that the guy out there for me must be FABULOUS because look at all this that I have had to go through for him.
I just cannot tell my family thank you enough. They are/have/will be doing so much for me. I will forever be in debt to you.
Wednesday, Tammy came down with Koy (she had a dentist appointment) and her and Nancy took me out to lunch. Nancy also made me an appointment with a therapist. It was good to have them here and just knowing that my sisters were there to cry to. It was really good to talk to a therapist who didn't have any connections with the situation and could just listen and didn't really have to give any input but she did tell me that I did nothing wrong. She did encourage me to cry a lot and if needed, take a lot of walks. Knowing that I have had this similiar thing happen in the past (twice) I keep thinking, what is wrong with me.
Thursday and Friday I did go to work and start in on my normal routine. It was hard, I cried a lot and I would cry out of the blue. But I pulled through. I have a lot of coworkers and a boss who really cares.
Saturday morning, we went to the Hydrocephalus walk at Sugarhouse Park. That was fun to enjoy that with Tyler. That was just the beginning of the family filled weekend. My parents came up that day because Grayson was getting blessed in church. After much thinking and talking with my family, we decided that the best thing for me to do is move out of my apartment that I was living in and move into Nancy and Dallas' house in the spare room for a few months. So Saturday, that's what we started doing. We got A LOT packed! My dad is just amazing. He had a torn meniscus and he was helping me pack. Mom did what she does best, held the baby while we packed (she's a grandma!) By the time we were done that night, we were so done!
Sunday we got up and went to Grayson's blessing. It was good to go back to church. It has been a long time. While I was sitting there between my brother and sister, I had so many thoughts going through my mind. This is what I want; I want someone who can sit with me and my family at church, someone who will come and be with my family. My family has played such an important role the past week, I want whoever is in my life to know that my family is always going to be in my life, NO MATTER WHAT. Later that night, we went and moved the bigger items from the apartment. My brother was so helpful and he bought my couches from me. (He really needed the loveseat for his office but oh well, he still helped out) and he stored my bed for me.
Monday we took all the stuff up to Cache Valley cuz we were heading up to the land of the cows for the Labrum Family Reunion! It was so good to be around all my family. I had my cousins and aunt and uncles come up and just ask if I was ok. They are such a strength.
So, now here I am. I am living at Nancy's. It's hard to know that a week ago all this happened. But I am so proud that I have been able to pull through this. I know that if it wasn't for my family, I don't know how I could've done it. I know I will definately have my ups and downs. Since this is the 3rd time this has happened, I just have to keep telling myself that the guy out there for me must be FABULOUS because look at all this that I have had to go through for him.
I just cannot tell my family thank you enough. They are/have/will be doing so much for me. I will forever be in debt to you.
Friday, August 19, 2011
Summer at a Glance
I started the summer out by doing Susan G Komen, Race for the Cure. This was the 2nd time I did it. I LOVE doing it!!! These are just some pictures I took with my camera. There were SOOOO many people there. Here are some facts I got from Susan G Komen SLC page on FB : Race For The Cure - By the numbers: Total Participants 16,096, Survivor Participants 1,040, top fundraising team Myriad’s BRAC Pack ($7,056) & top fundraising individual Gail Winterfeld ($4,685)!!! I was on the Myriad's BRAC Pack again, I raised over $100!
I took a lot more 4th of July pictures, but Ty looked so cute here so I will only post the 1. We sat with the Brown's at Zions Bank in Murray. Ty had so much. He LOVED the marching bands. He would get up and dance and he had to keep telling me over and over that he has 2 flags!
I rode down with Nancy, Tyler and Grayson for the big Emery County Fair Parade. We had so much fun. We left SLC around 7:30 (later then planned) and made it to Castle Dale just in time for the parade. We sat with the Labrum kids (Jess, Spence, Cass, and Logan) at Pro-Rehab. Grandma Labrum got to sit and rock her new baby while me, Grandpa and Nancy were out getting candy. We scored BIG with the candy this year!!! After the parade, we went to the fair grounds and ate LAMB! YUMMY. We went back to my parents house and we had some nice surprise visitors! Grandma Carol, Jaylee, and Jackie came up to see Baby Grayson. Then Aunt Ruanne and Kristi came. Tyler loved showing off but he sure did want to go down to the Hardware Store. So we went down to ACE and Tyler was on a scavenger hunt to FIND THE HAMMERS!! Well, he found them. We got our fishing licenses and off we went to Potter's. We fished for a few hours. Me and Grandpa each caught a fish. Tyler kept catching his "big red gooey fish". We got home we were all tired, fell asleep and got up the next day and came home to finish the weekend in our own homes. It was a great weekend!
Thanks for making me always feel invited to events, Nanc.
I took a lot more 4th of July pictures, but Ty looked so cute here so I will only post the 1. We sat with the Brown's at Zions Bank in Murray. Ty had so much. He LOVED the marching bands. He would get up and dance and he had to keep telling me over and over that he has 2 flags!
I rode down with Nancy, Tyler and Grayson for the big Emery County Fair Parade. We had so much fun. We left SLC around 7:30 (later then planned) and made it to Castle Dale just in time for the parade. We sat with the Labrum kids (Jess, Spence, Cass, and Logan) at Pro-Rehab. Grandma Labrum got to sit and rock her new baby while me, Grandpa and Nancy were out getting candy. We scored BIG with the candy this year!!! After the parade, we went to the fair grounds and ate LAMB! YUMMY. We went back to my parents house and we had some nice surprise visitors! Grandma Carol, Jaylee, and Jackie came up to see Baby Grayson. Then Aunt Ruanne and Kristi came. Tyler loved showing off but he sure did want to go down to the Hardware Store. So we went down to ACE and Tyler was on a scavenger hunt to FIND THE HAMMERS!! Well, he found them. We got our fishing licenses and off we went to Potter's. We fished for a few hours. Me and Grandpa each caught a fish. Tyler kept catching his "big red gooey fish". We got home we were all tired, fell asleep and got up the next day and came home to finish the weekend in our own homes. It was a great weekend!
Thanks for making me always feel invited to events, Nanc.
Happy 34th Anniversary!
I have THE BEST parents! They have an amazing story on how they met and got married. I am so proud to have them as my parents.
My parents are best friends. They are always together and I can actually say they really like to be around each other. My dad is so sweet to my mom. He will take her lunch every day at work and sit there and eat with her then he goes off to his second job. Growing up, I remember him sending her flowers "just because" and Just to tell her he loved her. They are great examples to me and to their family.
My mom recently posted on her FB that it brings her to tears seeing how much pain my dad is in. That shows their relationship to a T! One hurts, the other hurts. One is laughing, the other laughs. I have the best parents anyone could EVER ask for!
Happy Anniversary to you Mom and Dad! Dad, I hope you start feeling SOMEWHAT better. I know your shot is coming up. Mom, I hope your leg starts healing soon. I love you guys so much. You have been amazing parents and you have 8 amazing grandkids and 7 kids (8 if you are going to count Mike :)) I personally want to say thank you for EVERYTHING you have done to help me out. I love you guys so much. Enjoy your day together, school is starting back up. Don't wear yourself out.
I think it's time for a new family picture, since this picture was taken we now have 2 more additions :)
My parents are best friends. They are always together and I can actually say they really like to be around each other. My dad is so sweet to my mom. He will take her lunch every day at work and sit there and eat with her then he goes off to his second job. Growing up, I remember him sending her flowers "just because" and Just to tell her he loved her. They are great examples to me and to their family.
My mom recently posted on her FB that it brings her to tears seeing how much pain my dad is in. That shows their relationship to a T! One hurts, the other hurts. One is laughing, the other laughs. I have the best parents anyone could EVER ask for!
Happy Anniversary to you Mom and Dad! Dad, I hope you start feeling SOMEWHAT better. I know your shot is coming up. Mom, I hope your leg starts healing soon. I love you guys so much. You have been amazing parents and you have 8 amazing grandkids and 7 kids (8 if you are going to count Mike :)) I personally want to say thank you for EVERYTHING you have done to help me out. I love you guys so much. Enjoy your day together, school is starting back up. Don't wear yourself out.
I think it's time for a new family picture, since this picture was taken we now have 2 more additions :)
Sunday, July 31, 2011
Week of bad luck
Well, the past few weeks haven't been all the great. I came down with a bad head cold. Mike came home with it and then I got it. I got it over the weekend last weekend (over the 24th of July weekend). I spent the holiday in the house trying to recover.
On Tuesday, I was heading to work. Went to Jamba Juice and was driving on 1300 E by West Minster College. Jamba Juice has a problem with their lids fitting on their cups, and I was putting the lid on the cup and putting it in the cup holder. When I looked up, the car in front of me had stopped. I didn't have time to stop and I ran into him. I said choice words and pulled over to the side of the road. By that time, I had smoke coming up out of my hood and into my car through the vents. The other driver was just sitting in the middle of the road with a dumb look on his face, I motioned him to pull over so other cars could go past. I immediately got my phone and called 911 and told the dispatch we were past West Minster and I didn't know the exact address. They said they would get a officer out there. Then I called my boss and told her I would not be in because I got in an accident. She asked if I was ok and if she needed to come down (I didn't have another ride) so she said she would come down. I then called Mike and my dad and let them know that I had been in an accident. Mike's car was in the shop at that time because the fuel pump went out.
The cop finally showed up and he said we needed a tow truck for my car. Lynne (my boss) was there and was SO great and made sure I had a ride home) Tammy and Josh gave me the address to Josh's work for the tow truck to tow it there. Lynne drove me home when the tow truck got my car.
The next day I had MAJOR whiplash, my neck was SOOO sore and when I hit the other car, my chest had hit the steering wheel. I was very sore. The airbags did NOT go off.
The insurance is looking at the car and getting an independent adjuster to look at it and they will decide to fix it or to claim it a total loss. Most of the major damage is all mechanical. The radiator needs to be replaced (that it was what smoking), the AC Condensor, and the fan. Then for the body repair: the hood, bumper, the lights..
On top of healing from the car, I'm still trying to get over this headcold. I'm ALMOST over it! I'm just hoping that next week will bring better luck for me.
On Tuesday, I was heading to work. Went to Jamba Juice and was driving on 1300 E by West Minster College. Jamba Juice has a problem with their lids fitting on their cups, and I was putting the lid on the cup and putting it in the cup holder. When I looked up, the car in front of me had stopped. I didn't have time to stop and I ran into him. I said choice words and pulled over to the side of the road. By that time, I had smoke coming up out of my hood and into my car through the vents. The other driver was just sitting in the middle of the road with a dumb look on his face, I motioned him to pull over so other cars could go past. I immediately got my phone and called 911 and told the dispatch we were past West Minster and I didn't know the exact address. They said they would get a officer out there. Then I called my boss and told her I would not be in because I got in an accident. She asked if I was ok and if she needed to come down (I didn't have another ride) so she said she would come down. I then called Mike and my dad and let them know that I had been in an accident. Mike's car was in the shop at that time because the fuel pump went out.
The cop finally showed up and he said we needed a tow truck for my car. Lynne (my boss) was there and was SO great and made sure I had a ride home) Tammy and Josh gave me the address to Josh's work for the tow truck to tow it there. Lynne drove me home when the tow truck got my car.
The next day I had MAJOR whiplash, my neck was SOOO sore and when I hit the other car, my chest had hit the steering wheel. I was very sore. The airbags did NOT go off.
The insurance is looking at the car and getting an independent adjuster to look at it and they will decide to fix it or to claim it a total loss. Most of the major damage is all mechanical. The radiator needs to be replaced (that it was what smoking), the AC Condensor, and the fan. Then for the body repair: the hood, bumper, the lights..
On top of healing from the car, I'm still trying to get over this headcold. I'm ALMOST over it! I'm just hoping that next week will bring better luck for me.
Sunday, July 17, 2011
Summer
In 2 months of time, I got 2 nephews. Grayson and Isaac. Isaac came into our family from adoption. He is SO cute! Barrett and Chantel have been waiting for so long and he finally came May 1 weighing a big 5 lbs! Grayson came July 12 to Nancy and Dallas and he was 6 lbs.
Congrats to all
Congrats to all
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